Terrible 2s (times 2)

It has been a while.

Probably because my summer vacation ended and I had to go back to work which means that I have NO time to...um...blog.

Maybe because when I read other blogs I'm so entertained by their posts that it makes me a little self-conscious about my own writing so I just give up on my own blog.

Or it could be that I have slacked in the picture taking department.  My little point and shoot is just not doing it for me anymore and the shots I capture aren't blog-worthy.

These are just a few possibilities on why it has been so long.  While these are all valid statements from me on why I haven't been blogging, the truth is that I am dealing with a more personal issue.

My sweet little angel baby (yes, this cute little girl at the top of the stairs)

is now

deep into her TERRIBLE TWOs

If I say left, she goes right.
If I say stop, she says "No, you stop!" and then I'm like "Did she really just say that?" and then we go to time out and then it's like a scene from Super Nanny.  Back and forth.  Screaming (from her) and crying (from me...and her) and R is watching (sometimes he steps in and miraculously she LISTENS) and other times he doesn't step in because, I mean, I have to learn to "control" her on my own, right? 

OR I call my mother and she laughs and says, "You were the same way.  You used to do the same thing to me." And then she says, "put Ryan on the phone".  and again, miraculously she LISTENS.

By the end of this daily scenario,  I am done.  I am exhausted.  I could collapse and sleep for days...if that were an option. The house is a mess.  I don't feel like folding the basket of laundry that awaits me that I had planned on folding when I got  home after I cooked dinner but the daily happened so now I'm like WHATEVER.

I don't understand.  Parenting wasn't supposed to be this hard.  I mean, I am the same person who considers herself a a master teacher who could control a classroom of 5 year olds with the clap of my hands and the ring of my little teacher bell.


The same person who considered herself a super organized person with a spotless house.  Not a thing out of place.

Before I had my own child I would look at other mothers and judge their parenting. (Yep, I did it.  I AM SO SORRY. I APOLOGIZE.  For real.) I would think in my mind..."I wish my child would do that to me" or "I would never..."

Well, I am eating every judgmental thought, comment, action....whichever it may be.

My child is giving me a run for my money.  

She is WEARING ME OUT.  

Most of the time, I feel like I don't know what to do.

This little girl

has rocked my little world.

And as hard as it may be, it is still the best 

"run for my money"

"rocked world"

and 

"WEARING OUT"

ever.

I wouldn't change it for the world.  I am learning to just take it a day at a time and thank God for her and all of her personality, independence, and "cuteness" because:

1. It could be worst
2. Some people wish for what I have

and I have to be content no matter what (Philippians 4:11).

Ryan, 

We have some difficult days but it doesn't matter.  I love you with everything in me.  You bring daddy and I a joy that we can't thank God enough for giving us.  You are growing up so fast.  Keep being you.

Love, 
Mommy and Daddy